Oh heeyyyyyyy. Remember me? It's been a while.
In fact, it's been so long that I'm pretty sure this post has got to be epic.
That's right. I've been playing with gif generators. If that's not epic, I don't know what is. Check out this gem:
You may be wondering why on earth I'd make a gif out of my boobs. I have a very good reason (other than the two very good reasons already exhibited). If you do a Google image search of the word 'epic' every 5th image is very similar to this one:
Now boys, if you read the image creator's caption and are feeling tempted to follow suit feel free to do so and I won't pass judgement. I'd say I won't even know, but let's face it, if you've read the rest of this blog and understand the holy powers I possess, you know I will know... but I will not judge. I love all God's creatures (Monday through Friday. All bets are off on the weekend).
But I also realize that despite my blessing you may not be in a position to follow suit. Maybe you are having breakfast with your wife as you read this on your iPad/iPod/iPhone/MacBook* (cereal and blog!); perhaps you are on the bus; perhaps you are giving a presentation of the contents of my blog at the office and now every man in the room is uncomfortable... Doesn't matter why, but I have the antidote:
Bet there's no fapping now...
So what have y'all been up to since I last blogged in March? I have been quite the busy bee. I travelled to many countries, visited many people, took many lovers... Okay. The last part isn't true, but I thought it would make me sound cooler for a second. That second has passed. I did in fact travel, but some of that was for work. Mostly I have been staring at my data and wondering (through a veil of tears more often than not) how on earth I am ever going to turn it into a convincing Master's Thesis so that I can GET ON WITH MY LIFE!
To deal with my stress, and to prevent multiple holes from being punched in my wall, I took up boxing/muay thai. I am having a hard time reconciling my love for boxing with my love of dinosaurs. Look at the poor T-Rex:
|Wook at da widdy biddy dino-arms :(|
T-Rexes clearly don't work out as much as I do.
|Shanosaurus vs. T-Rex: Exhibit A|
|Shanosaurus vs. T-Rex: Exhibit B|
|Why don't people take me more seriously!?|
*Any other tablet/smartphone/computing device is not endorsed by this blog
Note: Don't write on your face with eyeliner. It doesn't come off as easily as you would expect
**This post could not have been brought to you without the generous support of tonight's sponsors: coffee and insomnia**